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 Forum index » Diversions » TimeWasters
Dumb Laws
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LazarusLong
Unfettered


Joined: 20 Mar 2003
Posts: 453
Location: 93 miles SW of Ted Kaczynski's cabin

 		Dumb Laws
Not exactly a timewaster per se, but just plain funny:

http://www.dumblaws.com/index.html

For example, here in Montana, "It is illegal to have a sheep in the cab of your truck without a chaperone."

Look up your own state and marvel at some of the stupid laws. Very Happy
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 3:17 am
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konamouse
Official uF Dietitian


Joined: 02 Dec 2002
Posts: 8010
Location: My own alternate reality

 		In the State of Nevada: It's still "legal" to hang someone for shooting your dog on your property.

I have to wonder about that, because it has happened here in Las Vegas at least once since I moved here...but now that I know about the law, I'll have to warn konashark away from using his gun when he gets mad at the barking dogs next door.

Up in Reno: Sex toys are outlawed. I'm having a hard time with that one Wink
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r u a Sammeeeee? I am Forever!

PostPosted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 12:33 pm
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MageSteff
Pretty talky there aintcha, Talky?


Joined: 06 Jun 2003
Posts: 2716
Location: State of Denial

 		FLA
In Florida:
If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.

It is considered an offense to shower naked.

The state constitution allows for freedom of speech, a trial by jury, and pregnant pigs to not be confined in cages. (I cannot believe they just passed the pig provision. Having the law I agree with, but make it part of the State constition, I do not).

And one that several folks here would like to see followed:
Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging

We had several horses taken in the last few years and they were found on a ranch owned by a veterinarian, who had spray painted (with rutoleum no less) the distinctive markings on the horses.
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Magesteff
A small group of thoughtful people could change the world. Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead


PostPosted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 12:44 pm
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Varin
I Have No Life


Joined: 02 Dec 2002
Posts: 2456
Location: South of where I used to be

 		In Wisconsin:

There are an awful lot of laws about butter in this state...

Quote:
Butter substitutes are not allowed to be served in state prisons.

Quote:
As people used to smuggle it in from Illinois, all yellow butter substitute is banned.

Quote:
At one time, margarine was illegal

Quote:
State Law made it illegal to serve apple pie in public restaurants without cheese.

Quote:
Whenever two trains meet at an intersection of said tracks, neither shall proceed until the other has.


Well, no wonder it takes so long when I'm waiting for a train around here. You go first. No you go first. Nah, I have to let you go first.

Quote:
While all cheese making requires a license, Limburger cheese making requires a master cheese maker's license.


Quote:
You cannot "worry a squirrel."
??? Um ok.
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 2:58 pm
Last edited by Varin on Wed Nov 26, 2003 3:01 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Hojo
Veteran

Joined: 26 Mar 2003
Posts: 105
Location: Keeeeeeswack

 		In Toronto, Ontario:

You can't drag a dead horse down Yonge Street on a Sunday.

Well there go my plans for the weekend....

~H~
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 2:58 pm
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Varin
I Have No Life


Joined: 02 Dec 2002
Posts: 2456
Location: South of where I used to be

 		OK, I had to add one more from my home state, Indiana...

A man over the age of 18 may be arrested for statutory rape if the passenger in his car is not wearing her socks and shoes, and is under the age of 17.
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"I still miss him to this day and probably always will." - Todd Keeler, Chasing the Wish

"meta meta meta, I made you out of play..." ~ j5

PostPosted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 3:02 pm
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Ozy_y2k
Unfettered


Joined: 25 Sep 2002
Posts: 460
Location: Carmel, Indiana

 		Shocked

Crap.

(/me makes note to keep extra pairs of shoes and socks in car at ALL TIMES, in case any 17-year old barefoot girls pass by.)

PostPosted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 3:38 pm
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SpaceBass
The BADministrator


Joined: 20 Sep 2002
Posts: 2701
Location: pellucidar

 		You know, a lot of these "dumb" laws actually make sense if you pay attention to the idiom of the time of their writing, or don't take them out of context.

Quote:
One may not bathe without wearing "suitable clothing," i.e., that which covers one's body from neck to knee.

"Bathe" used to mean what "swim" does today. And yes, the social morés of, say, the roaring '20s were just a tad different than they are now.

Quote:
Drivers must yield to pedestrians who are standing on the sidewalk.

I'm sure they think it's dumb to imply that you're driving on a sidewalk, but this just means don't run over people at driveways. As a matter of fact, in Oregon the only time pedestrians DON'T have the right of way on a street is if there is an underground or overhead walkway for them to use in crossing the street, even if they're jaywalking or wandering down the middle of the driving lane. This is probably because pedestrians rarely win battles with cars.

Quote:
It is illegal to buy or sell marijuana, but it is legal to smoke it on your own property.

Same goes for minors and drinking alcohol. Is that dumb too? Is it uncommon?

Quote:
One may not test their physical endurance while driving a car on a highway.

Isn't it highly dangerous to drive while exhausted? What's wrong with this (besides the poor grammar, which is probably the fault of the website author who paraphrased it)?

Quote:
Drivers may not pump their own gas.

People tell me all the time how stupid this law is, until their cell phone rings while they're pumping their gas and they're engulfed in flames. This law also creates thousands of jobs for unskilled workers and prevents me from getting soaked when I need gas while it's raining, which is pretty much always.

Quote:
An adult may not show a minor any piece of classical artwork which depicts sexual excitement.

Hmm, seems like there might be some liberal interpretation of the actual statutes going on here. The website authors have inserted the extraneous word "classical" into this one, and focused solely on "artwork," which is one of many pornographic materials that are forbidden to be shown to minors. How many states forbid showing obscene materials to kids? I'll bet it's the majority. Still dumb?

Quote:
A door on a car may not be left open longer than is necessary.

See above. The full text specifies a door blocking auto, bicycle, or pedestrian traffic lanes, and defines necessary as the amount of time to load or unload passengers. Get your fat ass in or out, but stop blocking my lane of traffic.

Quote:
Lebanon: "Social games" are legal in clubs.

Quote:
Portland: Minors may not enter a room where a "social game" is being played.

And again. In context, it's clear that a "social game" isn't anything risqué as is implied, but rather penny-ante poker or similar games. Gambling is illegal in this, as in many, states (except for the state-sanctioned lottery double-standard, of course). There is an exception, however, to allow people to play socially, with a limit on the betted amount being the defining point of "social." Notwithstanding my personal preference not to molly-coddle the kiddies by overprotecting them from all of the world's ills, much legislation is directed at "protecting" them anyway, and gambling can end up being a serious problem for some people.

Quote:
Marion: Ministers are forbidden from eating garlic or onions before delivering a sermon.

I'm not sure what happened to the separation of church and state here, but I'm all in favor of this one. In fact, I think it should apply to all public speakers and anyone who is about to get on a plane or bus or elevator or other enclosed space with a bunch of unsuspecting victims.

Quote:
Babies may not be carried on the running boards of a car.

Once again we see some creative rewriting. The full text actually specifies that a child shouldn't be carried on ANY external part of a motor vehicle. Yes, it seems like a law legislating what should be dictated by common sense, but the real dumbness comes from the people who did this and made it necessary to make it illegal in the first place.

This site should really be called "laws which, when taken out of context and purposefully misinterpreted, are kind of amusing" (but I guess that would be a hard domain name to remember).



Quote:
Ice cream may not be eaten on Sundays.

Okay, wait, NOW I'm pissed. Wink
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 7:29 pm
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MageSteff
Pretty talky there aintcha, Talky?


Joined: 06 Jun 2003
Posts: 2716
Location: State of Denial
SpaceBass wrote:


This site should really be called "laws which, when taken out of context and purposefully misinterpreted, are kind of amusing" (but I guess that would be a hard domain name to remember).


Why does it not surprise me that someone has developed a Law book, TOOC site?
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Magesteff
A small group of thoughtful people could change the world. Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead


PostPosted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 8:34 pm
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SarKenobi
Veteran


Joined: 20 Apr 2003
Posts: 91
Location: Portland, OR

 		Well in Portland, and being a swimmer:

Quote:
People may not whistle underwater.


WELL CRAP! Rolling Eyes

There is also this law in Portland:

Quote:
You cannot wear roller skates in restrooms.


Ok, no more Skate World or Oaks Park rink where EVERYBODY goes into the bathroom with roller skates on.

PostPosted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 8:57 pm
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Myssfitz
Unfettered


Joined: 26 Feb 2003
Posts: 695
Location: In the pasture

 		Here's some for different cities in MD.

http://www.geocities.com/piccoru/dumblawsmaryland.html
-Baltimore: No person who is a "tramp" or "vagrant" shall loiter in any park at any time. They define tramp as a person who roves for begging purposes and a vagrant as an idle person who is able-bodied living without labor. It's a $50 fine. (since I'm unemployed and able-bodied does that make me a "vagrant"?)
-Baltimore: It's illegal to take a lion to the movies.
-Baltimore: It is a park rule violation to be in a public park with a sleeveless shirt. $10 fine. This would include joggers that go shirtless.
-Ocean City: No man can go topless on the Boardwalk. Shocked
-Ocean City: Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited. Shocked
-Rockville: Persons may not swear while on the highway.

http://www.ahajokes.com/laws020.html
Found a correction (thank goodness)
-A law from the early 1900's prohibits men from going topless on the Boardwalk. (Repealed)

These are state laws in Maryland.
http://www.dumblaws.com/states/states.php?State=Maryland
-Oral sex can not be given or received anywhere. Crying or Very sad
-Thistles may not grow in one's yard.

Here's some international ones.
http://www.lawguru.com/weird/part02.html
-England
Those wishing to use a television must apply for a license.
-France
Between the hours of 8AM and 8PM, 70% of the music in the radio must be by French composers.

And I didn't see any for Vancouver, so...
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PostPosted: Wed Nov 26, 2003 9:31 pm
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konamouse
Official uF Dietitian


Joined: 02 Dec 2002
Posts: 8010
Location: My own alternate reality

 		[quote="SpaceBass"]
Quote:
Drivers may not pump their own gas.

People tell me all the time how stupid this law is, until their cell phone rings while they're pumping their gas and they're engulfed in flames. This law also creates thousands of jobs for unskilled workers and prevents me from getting soaked when I need gas while it's raining, which is pretty much always.

Actually, Mythbusters has proven that the cellphone/pumping gas and then engulfment in flames issue is moot - can't happen.
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'squeek'
r u a Sammeeeee? I am Forever!

PostPosted: Thu Nov 27, 2003 11:53 am
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katya2032
Veteran

Joined: 08 Sep 2003
Posts: 149
Location: Texas

 		Goes without saying that Texas is just too screwed up for words. Here are a few of the laws from the site.

Quote:
It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing.


Damn, broke that one on more than one occassion. Wink

Quote:
It is illegal to milk another person's cow.


Probably implies that you either stole the cow or the milk.

Quote:
A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed.


M'kay... DA really wants to boost his/her conviction rate.

Quote:
A program has been created in the state that attempts to control the weather.


Stop all tornados!

Quote:
It is illegal to drive within an arm's length of alcohol - including alcohol in someone else's blood stream.


Shocked

Last, but not least...

Quote:
Owners of horses may not ride them at night without tail lights.


Actually understand this law, and have seen the devices they are talking about, but too funny not to mention.

PostPosted: Fri Nov 28, 2003 2:13 am
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aliendial
Unfictologist


Joined: 29 Sep 2002
Posts: 3438
Location: Far Far Away. Nowhere Near You. Really.

 		Isn't there a law against online poker spammers????



And oh yeah, Virginia - skipping over all the laws about permissible sexual practices:

It is illegal to tickle women. (Thank heavens! Those rogue ticklers are so annoying...)

No animal may be hunted for on Sunday with the exception of raccoons, which may be hunted until 2:00 AM.
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PostPosted: Fri Dec 23, 2005 9:54 am
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