unforum

[pinch1]

Calling upon the kindness of the benevolent SpaceBass

[SpaceBass]

Geeeez, layin' it on kinda thick there, aren't ya? There's no need to blow that much sunshine up my wazz just to get your account reactivated. Err, unless you're a hot chick and you're coming on to me...then it's perfectly acceptable.

I've hooked you back up... lemme know if you can't remember your erstwhile password, and also lemme know when you get logged in okay so I can delete your dupe account. Plz. Thx. Etc.

[jamesi]

HAH sunshine up the wazz! Come on Spacely, we have the chat log where you insist on people being super-nice to you for fear of being BALEETED from Unforums.

from #unfiction

[10:50] <jamesi> this is what i get for quitting smoking -- DNA swabs
[10:51] <Tien_Le> Hi Jon...huh?
[10:51] <jamesi> my insurance agent -- we're changing our policy to reflect our non-smoking status and they have to swab ya
[10:51] <Tien_Le> really!
[10:52] <jamesi> yea
[10:52] <jamesi> to prove there's no nicotine in your system
[10:52] <Tien_Le> how long does it take to make sure it's all gone?
[10:52] <jamesi> well, it's been a year since my last cigarette... i figure that's enough time
[10:53] <jamesi> to be truthful, i don't know how long nicotine stays in your system
[10:53] <SpaceBass> jamesi, unless you start doing what I tell you to do, you are going to be BALEETED from the Unforums.
[10:54] * jamesi blinks
[10:54] <SpaceBass> I want you to start smoking again.
[10:54] <Tien_Le> WHAT?!
[10:54] <jamesi> dude, I quit cold turkey after 9 years of pack-a-day status. you want me to do what now?
[10:54] <SpaceBass> either start smoking again, or you will be BALEETED.
[10:54] <Tien_Le> Space, that's not fair.
[10:54] <jamesi> if that is how you feel, i guess i have no choice but to start up again.
[10:55] <SpaceBass> ha ha ha I have so much control over you! i'm just kidding -- you don't have to start smoking again.
[10:55] * jamesi has quit (SpaceBass makes me cry.)

This is undeniable proof.

[pinch]

A little wazz-placed sunshine seems to have worked very well. Thanks for the hookup to my account. You may now delete pinch1.

So, SpaceBass . . . what are you wearing?

[SpaceBass]

[pinch]

I assure you, I am not your friend's fiance. I think you're avoiding the question.

[SpaceBass]

Well, I'll give you a hint...it's not a wetsuit.