View topic - UPDATE: Marcus blog 6/22

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Forum index » Archive » Archive: General » ARG: Aware

UPDATE: Marcus blog 6/22

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enaxor
I Have No Life

Joined: 25 Feb 2003
Posts: 2395

UPDATE: Marcus blog 6/22

Quote:

Tuesday, June 22, 2004
Today is starting to be decent day for me. I woke up and jogged. I was relieved. Almost like I was not carrying so much weight anymore.

It started as a soft easy jog. Then, I had a car behind me on these narrow streets. My first instinct was I am in danger. I am bit jumpy. So I took off. I mean I RAN. I haven't run that hard since High School. I ran harder than I can imagine. My Heart was pounding my face was red. I could hear my heart. No wind. It was amazing.

Then I felt the sense I had before. The sense I was running from something. I felt angry. Was I running from someone, or myself? When I went to Cancun, was I running from Jude? Or was I running from my own damn emotions. I felt I could out run my emotions. I ran harder now. My knee ached and started to quit responding. I ran even harder. But no matter how hard I ran I could not escape the emotions trailing me. I felt them. I broke down and wept at the top of the hill. I wept for a long time. I realized I could not hold the emotions back. And I grieved. Not for my loss, but for Marty and Judes. I was completely settled after that. I walked on my newly reinjured knee back home. I ate a pop-tart and relaxed. I haven't relaxed in a while. I relaxed completely. No skirt chasing, no thoughts of Ideltech, and no damage control. I let it go, for at least an hour. I let it go.

Not sure why this all happens like this. Why is one persons misfortune anothers learning experience?

_________________
10/05/2007, 04/23/2009, 07/02/2015
The world is a much dimmer place.

Posted: Tue Jun 22, 2004 11:28 am

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