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 Forum index » Archive » Archive: General » ARG: UnholyMovie
[LOCKED] julie r u safe?
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shinlee69
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Joined: 12 Jun 2005
Posts: 10
Location: ohio

 		julie r u safe?
im trying 2 find out if julie is safe....ive been watching this 4 sum time and just become a member....so yeah
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poop on a stick it better then cheese on a stick

-zack

PostPosted: Sun Jun 12, 2005 10:46 pm
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GuyP
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Quote:
poop on a stick it better then cheese on a stick


I'm afraid I doubt this very much. "Poop" largely contains indigestable material and is generally harmful to health, whereas cheese is both nutritious and tasty - although a little high in fat. I suppose that under certain circumstances (if you were designing a stick to chase people with, for instance) then poop on a stick may in fact be superior to cheese on a stick, but I hold that in the majority of cases, it's vastly preferable to have a stick coated in cheese.

Preferably with chunks of pineapple and a little salsa.

(Someone else will have to clue you in on Julie, I'm afraid.)

PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 12:11 am
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Phaedra
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GuyP wrote:
Quote:
poop on a stick it better then cheese on a stick


I'm afraid I doubt this very much. "Poop" largely contains indigestable material and is generally harmful to health, whereas cheese is both nutritious and tasty - although a little high in fat. I suppose that under certain circumstances (if you were designing a stick to chase people with, for instance) then poop on a stick may in fact be superior to cheese on a stick, but I hold that in the majority of cases, it's vastly preferable to have a stick coated in cheese.

Preferably with chunks of pineapple and a little salsa.

(Someone else will have to clue you in on Julie, I'm afraid.)


Well, all of the above holds true for real cheese. For Velveeta and "American" cheese, however, I believe the lady/gentleman might be right about their relative culinary value.
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PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 12:14 am
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GuyP
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 		So, in the new formulation, we can say:

Quote:
real-cheese on a stick it better then poop on a stick it better then velveeta on a stick


Or, for the more mathematically inclined:


Quote:
(RealCheese + Stick) > (Poop + Stick) > (Velveeta + Stick)


Collaborative problem-solving: what Unfiction is all about.

(Shinlee: I don't suppose you lost your frog?)

PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 12:20 am
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Phaedra
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GuyP wrote:
So, in the new formulation, we can say:

Quote:
real-cheese on a stick it better then poop on a stick it better then velveeta on a stick


Or, for the more mathematically inclined:


Quote:
(RealCheese + Stick) > (Poop + Stick) > (Velveeta + Stick)


Collaborative problem-solving: what Unfiction is all about.


Point.

But what of those odiferous comestibles that appear to belong to both categories simultaneously?
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PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 12:33 am
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ScarpeGrosse
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Phaedra wrote:
GuyP wrote:
So, in the new formulation, we can say:

Quote:
real-cheese on a stick it better then poop on a stick it better then velveeta on a stick


Or, for the more mathematically inclined:


Quote:
(RealCheese + Stick) > (Poop + Stick) > (Velveeta + Stick)


Collaborative problem-solving: what Unfiction is all about.


Point.

But what of those odiferous comestibles that appear to belong to both categories simultaneously?


/me stares blankly

Can you use smaller words?
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PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 12:35 am
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GuyP
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 		Good question, Phaedra. In this case, it's all a matter of perception.

A cheese with poop like qualities is nasty indeed - especially if offered by guests, when it would be rude to refuse. With the taste, and if you're especially unlucky, the texture, reminding you of all the worst poopy characteristics, encounters such as these can leave one traumatised.

That said - what could be a more pleasant surprise than a nice cheesy poop? A vast improvement on your regular poopy-poop, I'm sure you'll agree.

So:

Quote:
(RealCheese + Stick) > (Poopy Cheese + Stick) > (Cheesy Poop + Stick) > (Poop + Stick) > (Velveeta + Stick)


Although with our new configuration, I'm wondering if we're not being a little too harsh on the old Velveeta...

PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 12:39 am
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Phaedra
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GuyP wrote:
Good question, Phaedra. In this case, it's all a matter of perception.


Alas, aren't most culinary questions? A matter of taste, that is?

GuyP wrote:
A cheese with poop like qualities is nasty indeed - especially if offered by guests, when it would be rude to refuse.


Truly. I once had a particularly tumid agglomeration handed to me by hostess who smelled almost as acescent as her son (an unfortunate boy -- seemed permanently stuck in his Affenpinscher stage).

GuyP wrote:
With the taste, and if you're especially unlucky, the texture, reminding you of all the worst poopy characteristics, encounters such as these can leave one traumatised.


I shall be in therapy for the rest of my life.

GuyP wrote:
That said - what could be a more pleasant surprise than a nice cheesy poop? A vast improvement on your regular poopy-poop, I'm sure you'll agree.

So:

Quote:
(RealCheese + Stick) > (Poopy Cheese + Stick) > (Cheesy Poop + Stick) > (Poop + Stick) > (Velveeta + Stick)


Although with our new configuration, I'm wondering if we're not being a little too harsh on the old Velveeta...


My dear Guy, there is no need to faff about just to be polite. It's not as if you'll hurt the feelings of the Velveeta or anything.
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PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 12:46 am
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GuyP
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Quote:
Truly. I once had a particularly tumid agglomeration handed to me by hostess who smelled almost as acescent as her son (an unfortunate boy -- seemed permanently stuck in his Affenpinscher stage).


Mon dieu, how simply ghastly! I hope you didn't give undue countenance to such a fetid, vulgar rapscallion?

Quote:
My dear Guy, there is no need to faff about just to be polite. It's not as if you'll hurt the feelings of the Velveeta or anything.


Not to be cheesy, but I'm a stickler for manners - no need to poop on that.

Just for the record: are we all agreed, at this point in proceedings, that a sticky cheese is better than a sticky poop?

PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 12:57 am
Last edited by GuyP on Mon Jun 13, 2005 1:08 am; edited 1 time in total
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ScarpeGrosse
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GuyP wrote:
Quote:
My dear Guy, there is no need to faff about just to be polite. It's not as if you'll hurt the feelings of the Velveeta or anything.


Not to be cheesy, but I'm a stickler for manners - no need to poop on that.

Just to think outside the box for a moment: Are we all agreed, at this point in proceedings, that a sticky cheese is better than a sticky poop?


Yes, Guy, I do believe that we have indeed all agreed that sticky cheese is better. However, I do feel compelled to point out at this time that there is a vast amount of etiquette involved in serving and taking care of one's cheese, whether it be stuck or not.

Let us remember that the fact of the matter is that it is generally considered quite vulgar for a gentleman to display his cheese in a public place.
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PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 1:06 am
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Phaedra
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GuyP wrote:
Phaedra wrote:
]My dear Guy, there is no need to faff about just to be polite. It's not as if you'll hurt the feelings of the Velveeta or anything.


Not to be cheesy, but I'm a stickler for manners - no need to poop on that.


Pish tosh, dear boy, aren't we all?

GuyP wrote:
Just to think outside the box for a moment: Are we all agreed, at this point in proceedings, that a sticky cheese is better than a sticky poop?


I do believe we've reached some sort of consensus on that aspect of the debate, at least.

ScarpeGrosse wrote:
Yes, Guy, I do believe that we have indeed all agreed that sticky cheese is better. However, I do feel compelled to point out at this time that there is a vast amount of etiquette involved in serving and taking care of one's cheese, whether it be stuck or not.

Let us remember that the fact of the matter is that it is generally considered quite vulgar for a gentleman to display his cheese in a public place.


Oh! Indeed. The aforementioned chaetiferous lad did just that when his mother's back was turned. (The woman, incidentally, was eye-poppingly bathycolpian -- her bodice could have used a bit more bratticing, if you catch my drift. Not that I wish to be catty, or anything.)

I finally had to tell him, "Gaylord, darling, I know your mother would love to have us go out, but the fact of the matter is, I have this medical condition, this blennophobia, and I fear it rules out our dating in the foreseeable future. I'll be sure to let you know if it clears up, however."

I escaped his clutches while he was occupied in attempting to suggest, through ostentatious sniffing and suspicious sidelong glances, that his latest borborygm had been laid by someone else.

GuyP wrote:
Mon dieu, how simply ghastly! I hope you didn't give undue countenance to such a fetid, vulgar rapscallion?


Alas, I had to. Manners before morals.
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PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 1:13 am
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GuyP
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 		I'm afraid I must away, my dear ladies, for the dawn hath already broken over my estate and I must go discipline my foot-servants if only to remind them of their intended station in life. But before I do:

Quote:
Let us remember that the fact of the matter is that it is generally considered quite vulgar for a gentleman to display his cheese in a public place.


That as may be, my lovely - but more vulgar than displaying his poop covered stick?

Goodnight, and god bless. Shinlee69, Sir, I thank you profusely for sparking such enlightened debate.

PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 1:23 am
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Phaedra
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GuyP wrote:
I'm afraid I must away, my dear ladies, for the dawn hath already broken over my estate and I must go discipline my foot-servants if only to remind them of their intended station in life.


Ta, darling! May the Oneiroi innoculate you against the morning's clinomania. I do so hope you can join us tomorrow for our nightly cachinnantion and compotation.

GuyP wrote:
Goodnight, and god bless. Shinlee69, Sir, I thank you profusely for sparking such enlightened debate.


Seconded.

And now:

Ta ta. Goonight. Goonight.
Good night, ladies, good night, sweet ladies, good night, good night.
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PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 1:30 am
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shinlee69
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Joined: 12 Jun 2005
Posts: 10
Location: ohio

 		ur all ppl who like cheese and shit on 1 stick.....it was a joke ppl... A JOKE im trying 2 find out about julie and ppl are talking about shit and cheese omg......
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poop on a stick it better then cheese on a stick

-zack

PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 1:50 am
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jamesi
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 		Maybe they were a little confused as to what you were really getting at in your original post. I know I was. In any case, I don't understand what poop and sticks have to do with each other anyway, never mind the cheese.

Maybe Julie will be safer knowing that she has poop/cheese/stick loving people like you helping her out.

/me goes back to the uncontrollable shaking from the pain of his soul crying
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PostPosted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 2:06 am
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