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 Forum index » Archive » Archive: General » ARG: Acheron
Seriously. Limericks?
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rose
...and then Magic happens


Joined: 26 Nov 2003
Posts: 4117

Seriously. Limericks?

A line from the poem* my current sig is taken from reads "someone will forever be surprising [a] hunger in himself to be more serious": if that is you, dear reader, look elsewhere, because it is time to begin the

FIRST ACHERON LIMERICK CONTEST

Rules: submit a limerick by next Friday, the 13th of February

Prizes: unless I win money on another sports event, there will be one first place prize, one second place prize and one third place prize consisting of merchandise from NRU.

Judge(s): Me and whoever else I can get to help me

For inspiration, here is the limerick that enaxor contributed during the haiku contest:

There once was a man we called Jake
His life and time were at stake
He jumped thru a vortex
Landed at MetaCortechs
Now his whole world is a fake.

and a classic:

There was a young lady named Bright
Whose speed was much faster than light
She set out one day
In a relative way
And returned on the previous night

GOOD LUCK!!

* FYI, the title of the poem is Church Going by that genius Philip Larkin. And don't worry, the literary standard set by Mr. Larkin does not apply to the judging of the limericks.
_________________
I love this site for being free, in every sense of the word~Spacebass

Mankind was my business, the common good was my business.~ Dickens


PostPosted: Fri Feb 06, 2004 12:56 pm
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Guest
Guest


There was a poor girl named Meg
For her husband's attention she'd beg
Is he a workaholic or not?
An ass like him should be shot
So Meg can get busy with Reg

PostPosted: Fri Feb 06, 2004 1:25 pm
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rose
...and then Magic happens


Joined: 26 Nov 2003
Posts: 4117

Form of limerick

OK - the limerick has a fixed form which is easier to hear when read aloud than it is to describe. But, here it is, anyway:

A limerick consists of 5 lines of anapestic meter (anapest is a metrical foot of two unaccented syllables followed by one accented syllable; in anapestic meter the majority of the feet are anapests). The first two and fifth lines are are trimeter (which means they have three feet) and the second and third lines are dimeter (which means they have two feet).

The rhyme scheme is aabba

but adherence to this structure is not required (or even important) in our contest

just write what sounds correct to you and you will be fine!
_________________
I love this site for being free, in every sense of the word~Spacebass

Mankind was my business, the common good was my business.~ Dickens


PostPosted: Fri Feb 06, 2004 1:30 pm
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Diandra
Unfettered


Joined: 27 Sep 2002
Posts: 390

Acheron Limerick

We're playing this game, Acheron,
Where this guy, Jake, was here then was gone.
Our timelines diverged,
But we hope they'll be merged,
So we'll know wtf's going on.

Dia
_________________
You can't solve vast puzzles with half-vast ideas!

PostPosted: Fri Feb 06, 2004 2:13 pm
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dashcat
Entrenched


Joined: 09 Dec 2002
Posts: 816
Location: Under the bed

I tried this out on a few dogs and they all laughed so...this is for the doggies.

WOOF

Lowchen, Coonhound, Bergamasco
Ibizan, Saluki, Cane Corso
Mastiff, Pug, Harrier
Maltese, Fox Terrier
Damn that Lagotto Romagnolo
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I'm a Sammeeeee cat and an Urban Hunter

PostPosted: Fri Feb 06, 2004 4:18 pm
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Myssfitz
Unfettered


Joined: 26 Feb 2003
Posts: 695
Location: In the pasture

We passed the time with Chasing the Fish,
While we were waiting for Chasing the Wish,
Now there's Acheron,
With some guy named John,
And think I'll just go call the commish.

Sad, I know Laughing
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Well, Moo

PostPosted: Fri Feb 06, 2004 4:21 pm
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alogicnamedjoe
Boot


Joined: 11 Dec 2003
Posts: 54
Location: Lost

How about these:

Help Me Grumpyboy, You're My Only Hope:* A Limerick

*please feel free to read a very subtle homage to Carrie Fisher into this title

The message from Stanford was well scripted:
NRU transcript needed with all courses listed.
But, thanks to Reggie and Jake
And that lawyer named Lake
The damn thing arrived all encrypted.


Disgruntled Grad Student: The Reprise

I thought that time travel was bull
A hoax over my eyes pulled like wool
But, it's worse than I feared:
NRU disappeared?!?
Damn! I just paid my tuition in full


The Reprise: Reloaded

NRU doesn't exist? What the heck?!?
I feel like Craig Becker just stabbed me in the neck.
While things might get worse
This time I won't curse
'Cause the bank cleared my bursary cheque.
_________________
[watch this space]

PostPosted: Fri Feb 06, 2004 9:07 pm
Last edited by alogicnamedjoe on Sat Feb 14, 2004 3:38 am; edited 2 times in total
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addlepated
Unfictologist


Joined: 17 Aug 2003
Posts: 1885
Location: Austin, Texas

There once was a woman named Meg
Who encountered a fertilized egg
Is it really a demon
or merely bad semen?
At least it's not the spawn of Craig.


There was a programmer at work
Who'd say merely, "Play chess with Turk".
He played lots of chess
Was a general mess
And now on his blog he does lurk.

Regarding the man named Caretaker
Who fancied he was a bird baker
Said he, quite jocose
as he brushed off dear Rose
"Damned if I ain't a heartbreaker!"

PostPosted: Fri Feb 06, 2004 11:26 pm
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The White Knight
Guest


There once was a man from nantucket.....
[Poem Deleted due to content]

:lol

Ok but seriously

Increased flux capacitor senitivity
Flowed backed quantum relitivity
Jake's quick chrono-shift
Made a cuasality rift
Which increased the mans fertility

(Thats quite hard to say!)

PostPosted: Mon Feb 09, 2004 6:14 am
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Sunny du Pree
Unfettered


Joined: 01 Jan 2003
Posts: 636
Location: Push, Nevada

There once was a young lady named Rose
Who convinced us to write Haikus with her prose
She gambled and won
and gave swag by the ton
Now White Knight has to keep on his toes.
Laughing
_________________
Grace and Peace
Sunny Du Pree
I dreamed a dream and now that dream has come for me


PostPosted: Tue Feb 10, 2004 4:28 pm
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The White Knight
Guest


For the Baby

World domination is his goal
he's just a few days old
He's a little small fry
He had a glow in his eye
And now he'll eat your soul

PostPosted: Wed Feb 11, 2004 12:48 am
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The White Knight
Guest


Meg was full of sorrow
Caretaker is our hero
Becker is a Fake
We all hate Jake
Gb will solve it by tomorrow

PostPosted: Wed Feb 11, 2004 1:14 am
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Guest
Guest


(apologies for tenuous rhymes)

there was a young lady named lurker
who once was a diligent worker
'til she found meg and jake
and the tail eating snake
now her office would like to transfer her…

there once was a fellow named jake
who with meg, a giant baby did make
on this happy event
send them a present
perhaps garlic, a cross or a stake

PostPosted: Wed Feb 11, 2004 8:11 am
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lurker
Boot


Joined: 06 Nov 2003
Posts: 52
Location: uk

that last one was (unsurprisingly) me. did you guess? seem to have trouble staying logged in at the moment.

PostPosted: Wed Feb 11, 2004 8:23 am
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enaxor
I Have No Life

Joined: 25 Feb 2003
Posts: 2395

There once was a lad named Billy Bob
Whose birth made his mothers head throb
Now that he's here
Seeing his picture we fear
The end of the world is his job
_________________
10/05/2007, 04/23/2009, 07/02/2015
The world is a much dimmer place.


PostPosted: Wed Feb 11, 2004 11:24 am
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