Author
Message
LazarusLong
Unfettered
Joined: 20 Mar 2003 Posts: 453 Location: 93 miles SW of Ted Kaczynski's cabin
Have a disease named after you! You can have a disease named after you!
http://thesurrealist.co.uk/disease
Mine:
Spoiler (Rollover to View):
Textbook example. You are suffering from Long's Syndrome.
Cause: sexually transmitted
Symptoms: occasional halo, confusion, narcolepsy, breathing difficulties
Cure: infect someone else
_________________"Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea."
Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2004 3:11 pm
Diandra
Unfettered
Joined: 27 Sep 2002 Posts: 390
Who wrote this thing. I think they know me.
Spoiler (Rollover to View):
Diaitis
Cause: lack of sleep
Symptoms: colour blindness, orange blotches, crying
Cure: take two shots of morphine every day before meals
_________________You can't solve vast puzzles with half-vast ideas!
Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2004 3:37 pm
Giskard
Sassypants
Joined: 07 Oct 2003 Posts: 2066 Location: Chicago
Heh, the cure to my disease might give me Long's Syndrome
Spoiler (Rollover to View):
I thought as much. You are suffering from
Giskarditis.
Cause: zombie attack
Symptoms: rosy cheeks, abdominal swelling, foot swelling, sudden aphasia
Cure: smoke one and a half cigarettes every day before meals
_________________"They never tell you truth is subjective, they only tell you not to lie." -- Gary Jules
Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2004 3:45 pm
joebrent
Unfettered
Joined: 01 Oct 2003 Posts: 640 Location: New York, sometimes
Quote:
I'm afraid it's bad news. You are suffering from
Joebrentosis.
Cause: excessive Internet usage
Symptoms: excess mucus, extremely low blood pressure, watery eyes
Cure: cryogenic freezing until science catches up
I even have a cold at the moment. Well, see you all in a thousand years.
Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2004 3:51 pm
Varin
I Have No Life
Joined: 02 Dec 2002 Posts: 2456 Location: South of where I used to be
Quote:
Bad luck! You are suffering from
Varinosis.
Cause: sexually transmitted
Symptoms: depression, sudden dislike of modern architecture, sudden appetite changes, ectoplasm
Cure: trepanning
And I thought it was just an ear infection....
_________________"I still miss him to this day and probably always will." - Todd Keeler, Chasing the Wish
"meta meta meta, I made you out of play..." ~ j5
Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2004 4:00 pm
bagsbee
Unfettered
Joined: 21 Oct 2003 Posts: 417 Location: NYC
Quote:
You'd better sit down. You are suffering from
Bagsbee's Disorder.
Cause: bad cheese
Symptoms: hair loss, sudden hot flushes, occasional constipation, swarms of bees
Cure: take four ibuprofen and come back in the morning
Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2004 4:02 pm
BoJangles
Boot
Joined: 14 Mar 2003 Posts: 67 Location: B.C. Canada
Good lord! You are suffering from
BoJangles' Lurgy.
Cause: thinking too hard
Symptoms: excessive facial hair, vague thirst for human blood, pointy ears
Cure: Kryptonite
_________________I might repeat to myself, slowly and soothingly, a list of quotations beautiful from minds profound; if I can remeber any of the damn things. - Dorothy Parker
Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2004 4:22 pm
Martavius
Charter Member
Joined: 25 Sep 2002 Posts: 55 Location: Toronto
Quote:
Bad luck! You are suffering from
Martaviusitis.
Cause: poor dental hygiene
Symptoms: frequent vegetarianism, turning into a giant monster, extreme black eyes, vague facial hair
Cure: eat more salt
And just because it had to be done:
Quote:
You'd better sit down. You are suffering from
JMXosis.
Cause: the wrong type of snow
Symptoms: vomiting blood, blood powdering, euphoria
Cure: infect someone else
Muahahahahaha
_________________Chaos! Panic! Disaster! (My work here is done)
Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2004 5:00 pm
cabalagent23
Veteran
Joined: 25 Sep 2002 Posts: 99
Another one that seems just a little too accurate
Quote:
Bad luck! You are suffering from
Cabalagent's Disorder.
Cause: lack of sleep
Symptoms: restlessness, aphasia, extreme muscle spasms
Cure: acupuncture
Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2004 6:20 pm
colin
Entrenched
Joined: 13 Oct 2003 Posts: 810 Location: Australia
Congratulations! You are suffering from
Colin's Lurgy.
Cause: computer virus
Symptoms: premature greying, vague hair growth, glowing
Cure: don't do it again
...congratulations? i guess its a good thing
Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2004 6:27 pm
aliendial
Unfictologist
Joined: 29 Sep 2002 Posts: 3438 Location: Far Far Away. Nowhere Near You. Really.
You'd better sit down. You are suffering from
Aliendial's Disorder.
Cause: stress
Symptoms: steam whistling from ears, finger pain, sweating
Cure: take a day off work
<see the steam?>
_________________aliendial
Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2004 7:05 pm
addlepated
Unfictologist
Joined: 17 Aug 2003 Posts: 1885 Location: Austin, Texas
Quote:
Addlepateditis.
Cause: cursed amulet
Symptoms: occasional breast pain, occasional regurgitation, metallic spots
Cure: take seven spoons of cough medicine a day until it goes away
I'll have to go to rehab after. Anyone else have painful boobs?
Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2004 8:20 pm
Myssfitz
Unfettered
Joined: 26 Feb 2003 Posts: 695 Location: In the pasture
Quote:
Textbook example. You are suffering from
Myssfitz's Disease.
Cause: Egyptian curse
Symptoms: narcolepsy, extremely chapped lips, occasional dizziness
Cure: drink a few glasses of water every day for the rest of your life
_________________Well, Moo
Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2004 8:40 pm
jamesi
Sentient Being
Joined: 25 Sep 2002 Posts: 2195 Location: Canadia
Bad luck! You are suffering from
Jamesi's Disorder.
Cause: genetically-modified noodles
Symptoms: excessive confusion, sudden swarms of bees, arm numbness, iris colour-changes
Cure: psychiatry
_________________
Digital Trail | Twitter | Retired ARGFest-o-Con 2012 Project Manager
Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2004 9:52 pm
Sunny du Pree
Unfettered
Joined: 01 Jan 2003 Posts: 636 Location: Push, Nevada
ok is it hair bleach or clorox????
eeee- eeeeeee- eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Quote:
I'm afraid it's bad news. You are suffering from
SunnyDuPree's Disorder.
Cause: stress
Symptoms: ringing in the ears, fear of the number thirteen, squeaky voice
Cure: bleach
how did THEY know that finding my inner dolphin would get such mileage???
_________________Grace and Peace
Sunny Du Pree
I dreamed a dream and now that dream has come for me
Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2004 11:24 pm
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